I moved from Texas to St. George, UT about 18 months ago kicking and screaming the whole way ( close, but not really) and it took me a very long time to get over the move. Actually, I’m not completely over it yet. You see, I was born and raised in Texas. Arlington, TX to be exact, which is a suburb of Dallas/Ft. Worth. I never thought I would live anywhere but Texas. Ever. Then I met my wonderful husband who convinced me to move to one of his favorite places as he had lived in St. George about 10 years before I met him. I didn’t know one single person for the first time in my entire life. I didn’t know where Walmart was. I didn’t know where the other mall was (oh that’s right, there wasn’t another mall), and I couldn’t find any grass or trees to save my life. I was living on Mars, where everything was red rocks and red dirt. Football was not important here and I couldn’t find a BBQ or TexMex restaurant that I was so desperately jonesing for. You could say I was a bit homesick and not happy.
So what is a Texas girl to do? I networked. I found a few networking meetings in town and started going, made a few acquaintances which led to a job building from scratch the new Washington City Chamber of Commerce. Working for the chamber was great because I was able to connect with so many people in town and many acquaintances evolved into friendships. Although I am no longer with the chamber, I am grateful for the doors it opened for me.
In my 18 months in Utah, I have made 2 very dear friends that I visit with almost on a daily basis. The funny thing is, you would never think we would have much in common. One friend is in her very early 20’s, single, from Vegas and no kids and the other friend is a married empty nester, from California who is retired. I myself am 36, and married with teenagers. 3 best friends, all from different parts of the country, in 3 different levels of life. So what could we possible have to talk about every day? Life, what else? We always end up talking about relationships (past and present), friendships (past and present), business, and our day-to-day happenings. We all have an interesting take on life and advise each other daily from our own perspectives. I absolutely love these women! They keep me grounded and keep me from being homesick 24-7.
Today we decided we needed a fourth to complete “The View”. We were thinking about a divorced recent empty nester who is back in the dating scene, mid 40’s…maybe from Utah. You know who you are 😉
The world of Facebook can be an amazing social place as well as a great business tool, but can also be a frustrating place. It is amusing to me how people “friend” and “un-friend” each other. I personally started using Facebook a few years ago for personal reasons, like most people…finding old high school friends, people I had lost contact with, and current friends and family. Over the last year, I have began using Facebook more as a networking tool than anything. My personal page and my business page are what I manage the most and I find myself being amused at how many others “manage” themselves on Facebook. Now I am not perfect by any means and have made my share of inappropriate remarks and TMI.
Recently I stepped on the toes of a couple of people in the business community, which I quickly apologized for when I realized what I did and how it looked. Within the hour, that person “un-friended” me, had some of their friends “un-friend” me and was “un-liked” off 3 business pages. Let me rephrase that…5 people don’t want to be my “friend” and they don’t want me on their business page. And for what? I didn’t run over anyone’s dog, I made a bad decision by showing up at an event that apparently I was not welcomed at because I am competition to their business. How old are we anyway? I have another friend who is no longer my “friend” who also “un-friended” me and took me off her business pages. I guess in all these circumstances I can somewhat understand the “un-friending” but why take me off their business pages? It lowers their numbers and unless I was trashing their page (which I was not) why would you want to lower your numbers?
You are probably thinking by now “WOW, she is really ticking off alot of people lately”, but remember the Facebook movie The Social Network…”You don’t make 500 million friends without making a few enemies”, so I’m not too worried about it. I find it all very comical actually, because all of the people I am referring to claim to be experts in the Social Media world in this small town, yet they are all having knee-jerk reactions. In business, you don’t allow knee-jerk reactions, you think it through, check the facts and then make decisions. I think “un-friending” is a passive/aggressive gesture which again, has no business in business. I always live by the rule “Keep your friends close, keep your enemies closer”.
So it’s Valentine’s Day. Here is where all the guys say “oh crap.”, all the single girls say “who cares anyways”, and many businesses say “cha-ching!”. I’m married and actually couldn’t care less about Valentine’s, however…it is nice to receive flowers and go out for dinner. I am more of a believer in “take me out and buy me roses because you want to, not because you feel you have to”. My husband is sweet and non-traditional romantic guy and absolutely despises going to restaurants on weekend nights unless it’s after 8pm and I don’t blame him. I on the other hand, would rather you spend $50 on a steak dinner, than roses.
So I’m on Facebook one day (of course) about a month ago and saw a contest on the Love Locks facebook page. They wanted to know what your love story was and you could win a dinner for two. I thought “Why not?” and told them how my husband and I met and fell in love and yadda yadda yadda. Well, we won! We get to have a candle light dinner for two at the Lovescape, music, goodie basket, and of course a Love Lock of our own. I was so excited because I love Love Locks and what a great gift for my husband from me…no restaurant waiting!
So what does Valentine’s Day mean to you? For me it’s just another day because my hubby and I still act like honeymooners anyways, but again, it is always nice to have a little extra special something once in a while, right? I like to reflect on our relationship and what is it about him that made me fall in love with him to begin with. So if it takes one day out of the year to make us all reflect on that, I say GO VALENTINE’S DAY!
Have you ever heard the saying, “fail to plan, plan to fail”? We had 2 weeks until our lease was up on our house and had still not found anything. When we finally did find something that was the right size in the right part of town at the right price, we jumped on it. Moving day came quick and as we moved in this past week, we forgot all about transferring utilities. You’d think we were novices at moving but we’re actually pro’s at it. I myself had moved 4 times between 2005 and 2007 (long story but a divorce was in there somewhere) and my husband and I have moved 4 additional times since 2008 when we got married. That’s 8 times I have moved in the last 5 years! Now some of those were situational, like when we moved my husband and his 2 boys into my house when we got married or before we moved to Utah and had to move everything into storage, live in a hotel for 2 months, move out of storage into a Uhaul, drive to Utah, move into another storage unit for 2 weeks until we found a house, then move again out of storage into the house. Another long story.
So the point I’m trying to make is, we have a lot of experience in moving, so when we moved again this time and forgot to call to have our internet and satellite hooked up it was a little frustrating. Especially when they said it would be almost a week until they could connect our service. “But the Superbowl is on Sunday, and I need internet…not just so I can check my Facebook but for my work”! After I whined and stomped my feet and realized there was nothing I could do, I tried to make the best of it. We actually got a lot done around the house which is a good thing when you just move in. The house is unpacked for the most part and we might even be able to park in the garage which is a lifelong dream of mine. Laundry is getting done, the house is clean, and the kids aren’t fighting. So it made me realize what I already knew. TV and computer/video games are time suckers. Not to mention they are what I like to call “electric crack”. When my kids get too much “crack”, they turn into monsters to us and each other. For the most part, this past week has been very pleasant and everyone has got along just fine. They even went outside and talked to human beings!
Now, I hope we have all learned a valuable lesson here…plan ahead to get your utilities turned on! Oh yeah, and turn off all the “crack” once in a while and just hang out and enjoy each other. 😉
I find people very fascinating sometimes, and sometimes they just shock the hell out of me. If someone has an issue with me personally I want to know what it is so that I can try and remedy the situation, otherwise, don’t complain about it. Makes sense right? However, there are some people in this world that won’t listen anyways so why bother telling them what is wrong. Those type of people I just distance myself from over a period of time. Hopefully they will realize something is wrong and ask about it, but if they don’t ask, then they probably don’t mind the distance and all is good anyways. Sometimes being a good friend is hard. Sometimes you can only be there for someone so much until it just sucks you dry.
Have you ever known someone who just keeps making the same stupid mistakes over and over and over again no matter how much advise you give them? What did you do about it? What can you do about it? I guess you can either A) accept it and stay friends and listen to them constantly complain about their mistakes they keep making or B) you can distance yourself from that person and move on with your life. But it’s hard to watch a friend spiral downward and go in a direction that you know is destructive behavior and what’s worst…self inflicted destructive behavior. Knowing full well what they are doing, pretending that the past never happened and getting angry with you for questioning their sanity.
Well, I’m going with option B. At least I have options.
So the past year has been a bit nuts to say the least. My husband left for Afghanistan in April of 2010 to work as a civilian contractor for an Australian military base. What was suppose to be 6 weeks turned into 8 months! While is was pretty rough, we managed (thank you Skype!), and I finally got him back about a month ago. Now we are in the process of moving…not far but just needed a little more room and more kid friendly area. In the past 6 weeks, I have started a new business, got my husband home, enjoyed Christmas and New Years, and now packing and moving…good times. The crazy part is, as much as everything seems to be in disarray, everything seems to be falling into place perfectly! Organized chaos? Maybe. But it’s 1am, only half my house is packed, tomorrow is moving day, and I’m on the computer…go figure.